Authentic living

Maybe it is my age, maybe it is this work I have been doing over the last decade or maybe it is just the year we have just had but the word "Authentic" looms large at the moment.

As I type this, I am listening to classical FM, there is a beautiful piece of music playing as I type this from The Carnival of the Animals "The Swan", which always makes me pause and listen to every note and instrument. There was a time that I would never admit to liking classical music, or the 70's disco that I love, or the indie stuff from the 90s. Why not share this? what stopped me from sharing what I like and don't like? Of course, this is just a small example but this fear of showing up in life as my true self ran much deeper.

I do feel there is a pull in life to be perfectly everything to everyone else, to mold ourselves and twist ourselves, crikey it is exhausting but there is another way, a road less traveled a road to being you.

It comes as no surprise that I find myself in this coaching niche, supporting others take this road less traveled to an authentic life, for it has been my own challenge over the years. I offer no solutions for this isn't a one size fits all, I offer my presence, my unconditional positive regard, a companion on this courageous journey.

Being authentic takes courage, for it is sometimes easier to stick with the status quo, even if we know it doesn't serve us, it may be a well-worn path.

For me, a wake-up call was imagining getting to the end of it all and looking back with regret, wondering where life had gone, and realising it was too late to eventually have the courage to live authentically. Having seen this happen, I wasn't prepared to let that happen in my life. It truly was a catalyst to change.

Often there is a fear of relationships changing when we start to live more authentically, in some ways yes our relationships are bound to change but consider how enriching it would be for your relationships if you were to live authentically, it can transform our relationships. Some will wither away, this is natural, but others will blossom.

Often this journey starts by rediscovering your authentic core strengths and values. Once these have been uncovered again, you may see different pathways and explorations opening up. Often my clients are surprised to discover a deep well of resilience from living authentically, finding it easier to weather the inevitable storms of life. Discovering strengths and values and starting that process of alignment can make us come alive, to live passionately and boldly.

Perhaps one of the greatest discoveries for me on this journey has been one of compassion and empathy. The more we come into line with our true authenticity, we see it in others, we give space for others to be who they are, celebrating it, for we know deep down how life fulfilling it is to live an authentic life.

There are no quick fixes, but there is something quite beautiful in this slower journey of discovery, one that is authentically yours.


If you are looking to take this journey, to discover again your true authentic self, Roger offers Authentic living, one-to-one coaching, and mentoring from his offices in Derby, or out in nature at the beautiful Whistlewood Common in South Derbyshire, online sessions can also be arranged. More information at Authentic living Coaching and Mentorship | Alder Tree Mindfulness Derby

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