Are you trying too hard?


Hello and welcome to our blog here at Alder Tree Mindfulness. In 2015, this business started its life as a blog, a blog about life. Some years later, a change of business name and lots of water under the bridge, that original blog is sadly no longer, lost into the ether somewhere but it is time to start afresh, to build something new, so here we are.

A lot of my work here at Alder Tree Mindfulness is about pointing people towards an all too often forgotten truth.......

"You are enough. Right now, right here in this present moment, in your current state of being, you are enough"

For so many years, I just did not get this, I kept running, running, running. I even forgot what I was running away from or running towards. Overwhelm, exhaustion, competition and comparison. Listening to some of the people that start this mindful journey with me, I know I am not on my own.

So here it is, not that you need it but you have permission to take your foot off the accelerator, to slowly ease on the brake. There are going to be some of you that this doesn't resonate with and those that want to plant their foot hard down on that pedal. I say go for it if that is what gives you joy and you can safely say "I am loving life" but those of us that are curious about what that gradual slow down feels like, what joy it can bring to life, what wonders await, then a warm welcome awaits.

That is the work we do here, together a gradual slow down, to end the running, to drop the overwhelm and exhaustion and explore life at a different pace.


It may seem a little weird to pause in a blog but lets try it. If you can just for a moment stop reading, close your eyes if it feels comfortable and just being your awareness to your breath, the in and out, rise and fall of the belly. Lets pause here for a moment..................................

Mmm, there we go, how did that feel? Mind decide to race off on something?. This is perfectly normal, this is just a gradual, gently squeeze of the brakes, not an engage reverse gear at 70mph. Little pauses just dropped in where you can. Explore and be curious, the more we practice the pause, the more we see that we don't need to stop those thoughts and mind racings, underneath all of that is something else, a little piece of solid ground.

What If?

What if it doesn't work out?

What if I miss out on something?

What if I fail?

and so on.

I hear you, so often we are running from these what if's? I love what if questions, but can you spot the problem with the above what if's? Yep, they are all negative.

Our minds are "seek and ye shall find" honing in devices. Remember buying that new car and then suddenly seeing that make of car everywhere? Selling house? I bet you see every for sale board in your neighbourhood.

So lets flip some of those What if's?

What if it works out?

What if I discover something new?

What if I succeed?

What if I discover more time to unlease my creativity?

Again, be curious, imagine these new what if's and see what happens.


That fear of missing out will rear it's head, it did for me and at times still does. Then I am reminded of the biggest lesson in life I ever heard. What if we got to the end of life and thought "crikey where did that go!". I have seen it and it is not pretty.

So, I didn't hesitate to delete facebook when I felt it was taking over my life, didn't worry about saying no to that invitation because I didn't want to go, the list goes on.

Life is fleeting, life is precious.

So ask those questions, What brings you joy? What can you drop from the list? What is it that is going to put you in touch with life again?

There is an easier way

So if overwhelm and exhaustion are looming, know there is another way. It's just a sign that we may be trying too hard, running too fast and who can blame us, this is a conditioning, just the way we have been conditioned.

Is it time to slip off the motorway for a while and take to those country lanes? to take it all in, to pause at the junctions, to consider the directions?

There is an easier way and wow there is great joy and beauty, contentment and energy, just waiting to be discovered.

If you fancy giving it a go, know that there is a supportive community here and signposts to that easier way.

More on the next blog.

Best Wishes

From Roger


Roger hosts a weekly podcast exploring this mindful journey to rediscovering the joy of living. New episodes are out each week. Available to download on the website

and on all the major podcast platforms, podbean, stitcher, apple podcasts and more, search for Alder Tree Mindfulness.

Next online introduction to mindfulness morning retreat is on the 10th October. Open to all regardless of experience and also gives access to Alder Tree Mindfulness online community and free weekly, live mindfulness sessions and ongoing support. More details at

We have some limited small group, in person sessions happening through Autumn and Winter, open to our online community. Longer in person courses and retreats to commence in Spring 2021.

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